Fighting... for this love I trust is definitely real....

Hello.
It's been a while since I updated.
Recently, I've been on a high... with the knowledge that she feels similar.

It's an awesome feeling... and I'm happy.... yet....

People have been bashing.
Friends of us both have been telling me not to bother with her.
How all I'm doing is putting myself thru stress.
Others warn me of being hurt later on.
More say that they are ashamed of me, still being around after a year.

I don't like to talk about her much to them when they ask, cuz they always have something of that sort to say.

It's not like I'm a hopeless lover, who's "dissatisfied with how things ended before and wanna make this right bcuz of that".

Really?

I'm not like that.

I've always been around... because I didnt lie when I said those 3 words to her.
I honestly love her... maybe a bit too much for a 19yr old.

I'm still young, and we defo cannot be together "forever".

I dont believe in forever.

But, I believe in "now", and "always been" and "always will be".

I know.

I've fallen in love with my last girlfriend... and I couldve sworn that she loved me too.

I was still having feelings for Laura, but I loved her (Mahelia) and now I dont even want to remember why, tho I do.

I respected our love, but she didnt, and she turned out to be... something I wont say.

Every time we meet, I feel resentment, but I still say hi.
She used me. badly and she didnt even care about my feelings.
That is why I left her, in a kind manner, i said I'll always care... but yeah.

Even I could say she doesnt deserve it.

But loving Laura is not a rebound. It's always been true.

So I will fight for our love. I will take the blows of everyone and stay strong.
For us both.

I know our pals only want good for me... and dont want to see me hurt.

But I wont be.

They say too: Oh even if it works out 4 a while, she still going to check man, and leave you behind.

Honestly, the thought is not foreign, i've thought it as well.

But I wont entertain it, because I trust her, and for her to tell me she loves me herself, that means something.

I.

WILL.

FIGHT.

I'm not a hopeless and sad "masochist".

I'm just someone who just happened to really love this girl.
I would even support her if she finds a boyfriend who really loves her, and well... might leave them alone in their happiness...because two lovers makes no sense to me.

People may call me stupid... but I'm sorry.
I'm strong.

I've went thru it all.
And will continue to do so.

So, leave me alone, kindly.

I love her and that's a fact i cannot change, not because I dont want to, I have tried, but because I cannot...and I know myself enough to tell.